As someone who has had multiple relationships with women 10 or more years older than me, the emergence of this dynamic modeled in popular culture has provided cause for excitement, as well as an opportunity for self-reflection.Is there something intrinsic to queer culture that is conducive to age gaps between partners?They have different needs,” said Michael Semon, a therapist in Birmingham, Alabama. A younger wife might want to have children, while someone getting remarried might not like the idea.”You have to decide if you’re going to introduce your children or have children together.One person might have already gone through that,” said Goodwin.And what is it about older women that’s so damn appealing to me?The first steps on my journey to becoming an adult who shuns ageism had little to nothing to do with being queer.Rather, it began with a childhood of formative familial friendships with my brother and older cousins, mostly male.I was raised among bright, kind, older boys who more often treated me as an equal than a nuisance.
I sometimes ask the men I talk to after their divorce from these much younger women, if they think the young women would have married them if they were not wealthy and I am often shocked when some of them answer yes.Hollywood legend Dick Van Dyke, 86, married a woman 46 years his junior in 2012, while Hugh Hefner's girlfriend (and former fiancee) Crystal Harris is 60 years younger than him.I read a very interesting study recently that clearly showed the odds of a marriage lasting based on the age differences of your spouse.The latest May-December romance that caught many people by surprise is between Mary-Kate Olsen, 25, and Frenchman Olivier Sarkozy, 42, (brother to former French president Nicolas Sarkozy)."MK is constantly complaining about boys not being mature enough for her," a source told , confirming rumors that the pair is dating. Now being a businesswoman dominates her time, and she is rarely impressed with guys." Though their 17-year age difference is, well, quite large, the Olsen and Sarkozy's romance isn't the most shocking.As a young person, I had a significant and persistent love for Dana Scully, which I later understood as an early queer curiosity, but I was also a very late bloomer who didn’t date a boy until I was 20, and didn’t date a woman until years after that.